I have always known that I am loved and valued. But my goodness, I have never, not once in my life, felt as comforted, supported, cared for and RAISED UP as I do at this time in my life. While I would never suggest getting (or a loved one getting) a terrible, horrible, no good, very bad disease could be a GOOD thing, there are actually positive moments in the darkness. A realization that although we live in this sometimes harsh and hard world, humanity is still very, VERY good. That our friends, and families, and neighbors, and communities, and churches and sometimes even strangers can become our every-day angels. Saying just the right thing at the right moment. Reminding you of their prayers. Bringing you a meal. Buying you a drink. Listening. Checking in. Making you laugh. Making you talk. Comforting. Giving hugs. Sending encouragement. Helping you forget. How amazing these acts of friendship, love and support are when you are suffering. How wonderfully made we are, indeed.
To all those angels, in MY life, I can never say thank you enough. But know that you have made a difference. You have been a light in this darkness.
As for Dad, his condition is fairly unchanged at this point, although it is getting harder and harder for him to eat anything, leading to weight loss and a loss of energy. Two weeks ago we traveled down to Houston to meet with Doctors at MD Anderson and were told that radiation and surgery were not an option at this point. Next week Dad will begin an approximate six months of chemotherapy. He will also be participating in a clinical trial.
All I can ask for now are (more) prayers. That Dad handles the chemo as well as possible. That the side effects aren’t too unbearable. That the treatment shrinks his tumors significantly. That he can begin to eat again. That he gets the actual drug for the clinical trial and not the placebo. That we all remain positive. That the doctors at MD Anderson give him the best care possible.
That he doesn’t give up.
No matter how hard it gets.